Monday, June 29, 2009


“Perhaps the artist longs to sleep well every night, to eat anything without indigestion, to feel no moral qualms, to turn off the television news & make a bologna sandwich after seeing the devastation & death caused by famine, drought, earthquake & flood.
But the artist cannot manage this normalcy. Vision keeps breaking through & must find means of expression.”
Madeline L’Engle

I drive down the road and sometimes have to stop and catch my thoughts. I have a tendency to be distracted by something- usually anything- and next thing I know I have a lifetime story in my head. Fearless stories of fictional characters who have faced far worse, more tragic lives than my own and how they have dealt with them. Sometimes its opposite- its the way i feel it should be. I am a people watcher. In airports I love to sit and see strangers and in my mind I make up their lives- are they happy? where did they come from? Single? Married? Searching? Found? These characters and imaginary fairy tales of love and lost are swimming aimlessly around my head. I put them down every once in a blue moon- but mostly they just drift off.

But what has gotten my attention more than recently is the spark. What triggers these notions of a unknown reality?

The spark lies in the fire. The spark is the Creator behind everything.

I once read that a artist relationship with their god is not effected by their life. But their life is effected by their god. My God- is the Creator. My life is driven by the creation. And every time I get the spark going, once I get my thoughts under control, I am forced to stand back in awe of what ignited it all.

“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there. If I make my bed in hell, behold You are there...”

Every where I go I am reminded how You are everywhere. You are in all things. You are guiding me.

“...Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me.” Psalm 139:7-10

Friday, June 5, 2009

Go forth

“I am given hope that I may remember how to walk across the water.” Journal entry November 5, 2008

Coffee cup number two of the morning is brewing in the kitchen and the dogs are resting at my feet. Looking out the window the rain steadily continues to pulsate to the ground. The bible open next to me and my blackberry not too far out of reach- all my addictions are in place. (with Phil Whickam serenading me). I am trying to enjoy the peace and quiet that surrounds me, knowing what is coming.

Do you ever get the urge to coop yourself up with Jesus? And don’t tell me you are always conversing with Him- your lying. We are all human and live in a world that likes to bully us with dirt and filth. But do you ever, honestly just desire not to leave your sanctuary? Today I am sitting in the kitchen and just enjoying being untouched. For right now, I can relax and just be who God made me and spend time with Him. I don't have to sit up straight (sorry dad), suck in my tummy, worry if my hair is frizzy, and sometimes I actually sing really really loud! Yet I know the reality. I have to leave the front door. I know that in about an hour or so I have to make myself presentable to the outside (cause you will stare), and go forth into the realm of the enemy. BUT (I LOVE that word) when I get dressed this morning,not only will I put on my clothes, do my makeup, try and tame my hair, but I will also put on my armor. I will put on my breastplate of righteousness and I will prepare my feet with the Gospel. Above all- I will have my shield of faith which will protect me against the wickedness that we fight everyday. My helmet of Salvation will be securely renewing my mind and thoughts and my Spirit will be sharper than any two-edged sword. I will walk through the front door- insecure in my own right, but confidant that I will boldly stand in our Protector. I will not turn my back to the evil principalities but I will face them in valiant trust.

Here we go....

“...that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us.” 2 Corinthians 4:7

Monday, June 1, 2009

Wedding Day

My heart had finally slowed down and the reminder to not lock my knees was dancing around in my head. The bouquet of flowers was starting to weigh in my arms and that is when I had to catch my breath. As one of my best friend came walking down the aisle, veil covering her gorgeous face, I couldn’t help but realize that Becca was becoming a wife. She was no longer about to be one, but she was becoming part of one. It wasn’t but an hour ago, that it started clicking for her that she was getting married! The day that every little girl plans since they were 5 was coming a reality.
As they were exchanging their promises of love and sanctity, I felt the goose bumps go up my arms. This is what we all were waiting for. As I started to reminisce on the past few days, I just kept smiling.
I had arrived in Washington D.C. with a bit of discouragement in my own heart and within my own life. But once again I was reminded how personal our God is. He knew exactly the words, the friends, the atmosphere I needed. I now contained a renewed joy and enthusiasm as I stood there, looking at Becca and Paul give not only their lives, but their marriage over to glorify the Lord. The ceremony was an intimate time of worship and remembrance of how our Father views His bride. We were all reminded, once again, how our lives are to represent His love towards us.

But then.... it was time to party! We ended the night with many dances (including the bridal party specialty of the Virginia Real) and many traditions. I honestly don’t think I have had that much fun in a long time. Here are a few captured shots of the big day!

The groomsman

The Bridal party after the Big Finale!

My girls that I love!

Aren't they precious?